Family Vacation Part 3: This Is How We Do It

I'm never gonna dance again. Guilty feet have got no rhythm! Though it's easy to pretend, I know you're not a foooool...

Me: Matty, TURN OFF YOUR ALARM before Careless Whisper becomes Homicidal Whisper. 

Day 1 of our vacation (I never count travel days) I was ready to go by 7:30. Unfortunately, my roommates did not feel the same so it took considerable hustling to get them out the door by 8:00. We were enjoying the balmy air of our air conditioned room, but then I opened the door. Suffocation. Who could think about eating with this kind of heat and humidity?

Matty's most anticipated part of this trip was the food. The kid is like a bottomless pit. 

Matty: Refried beans and chicken tacos at a breakfast buffet. Glory. This is going to be an epic week.

Me: You are sitting downwind at the beach. 

Confession: I am not a huge beach person. I am a do things, explore new places, immerse myself in a new culture kind of person. Not to mention that my skin hates the sun so I have to time my forays out from beneath an umbrella and into the ocean unless I want to look like a lobster. Somehow on the first day, in spite of having SPF 70+ shellacked on every visible millimeter of skin every half  hour, I managed to get the beginnings of a burn. Ok, time to be proactive. When we got back to the room I grabbed the green bottle of aloe vera and got to work.

Me: This doesn't smell like aloe vera...wait, why is this lathering?...You have got to be ki----! STINK!!
Rebekah: What?! WHAT?! Are you okay? 
Me: Just peachy. I slathered myself with bathing suit cleaner instead of aloe vera. 
Rebekah: [laughing like a hyena] Do you have sunstroke?
Me: The bottle was green! Aloe vera is green...Stop laughing. STOP. IT.
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